Perspective-taking: consider a viewpoint without claiming to know it

Considering a viewpoint is not the same as knowing what another person thinks. For an ordinary conversation, the useful distinction is between what someone has actually said and what you are imagining on their behalf.

Two accounts of one table

In an invented household scene, one person spreads a paper model across a shared table. Another person wants space to write a letter. The model-maker says, “I thought the table was free until dinner.” The letter-writer says, “I planned to use this end this afternoon.”

There are now two stated accounts. A third sentence—“You left it there because you don't respect my time”—would add an interpretation of motive. The scene provides no evidence for that interpretation.

A viewpoint note could have three separate spaces:

My account: I expected a clear place for my letter.
Their stated account: They expected the table until dinner.
What I still need to ask: Did we agree on a time or each assume one?

This is a fictional record, not a way to decide whose needs matter more. It leaves an unresolved question visible instead of assigning an intention to the other person.

A guess can stay a question

The letter-writer might wonder whether moving the model would disturb unfinished parts. They can ask, “Is there something about the model that makes moving it difficult?” The model-maker might answer yes, no, or explain a different concern.

That exchange illustrates consideration without requiring certainty. It also does not require the letter-writer to give up their request. “I understand why you want it left out, and I still need somewhere to write” can preserve both positions without pretending that an agreement has been reached.

Different from reflecting a message back

Active listening would concern how someone attends to and checks a message. This entry's focus is the viewpoint being considered. Empathy has its own source-specific account of understanding and experience. Naming a possible viewpoint is not proof that either person has understood the other fully.

For a family discussion, the three spaces can remain spoken rather than written. A child need not deliver an adult-style analysis of everyone at the table. An older learner or adult may prefer a private note before deciding whether to raise the issue.

Do not use the term as a character score

This example does not measure perspective-taking, infer ability from a disagreement, or explain anyone's behavior through ADHD. It also does not ask a person to excuse mistreatment or imagine motives in a threatening situation. The table scene concerns a routine, low-stakes disagreement only. Its note is an original illustration of separating accounts, not a therapeutic exercise or a source-endorsed intervention.

Source

[1] American Psychological Association, APA Dictionary of Psychology. perspective taking. Updated 2018-04-19; original publication date not shown. Accessed September 6, 2026. [1] uses only the terminology specified above; additional findings, recommendations, and source examples are not adopted.

Related guides

• Empathy
• Active listening
• Clarifying question
• Personal boundaries